My Dad Always Says…

If it isn’t broke, fix it till it is.
I don’t get even, I get odder.
I am having an out of money experience.
I am in shape. Round is a shape.
I’m not afraid of heights, I’m afraid of widths.
Practice safe eating, always use condiments.
Anything free is worth what you pay for it.
Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
It hurts to be on the cutting edge.
If marriage were outlawed, only outlaws would have in-laws.
If it weren’t for me, there’d just be a pile of my clothes on the floor.
I am not a perfectionist. My parents were though.